Thursday, March 25

I can't think straight. my heart feels like someone's burning it slowly, letting me suffer. or like someone is stabbing it with a blunt knife. it hurts. hanya Tuhan saja yang tahu. I dunno how many tears or times I've cried. and these eyes, these eyes I guess windows all of my sorrows.
when everything you thought was over, when trust settled back in, Boom! you blew it. big time. and until now I still can't accept it. my heart aches again and again every time I think of you doing it.
it's even sadder when that certain 'thing' you're doing doesn't even affect you anymore. what? bodohnya aku all this time I was fooled thinking you won't even touch it anymore. and why dalam banyak2 benda you nak buat, you idiotically have to take up this? WHY? where were all you're regrets before? where were your promises?
I dunno how I'm gonna cope this. and I dunno how this is going to end. Ya Allah, berikan aku ketabahan dan kekuatan untuk lalui semua ni. dan berilah dia hidayah untuk berhenti. he won't listen to me. pls pls pls stop what you are doing. don't make excuses just to cover up your act. pls I beg you. I love you.

Wednesday, March 3