I can't think straight. my heart feels like someone's burning it slowly, letting me suffer. or like someone is stabbing it with a blunt knife. it hurts. hanya Tuhan saja yang tahu. I dunno how many tears or times I've cried. and these eyes, these eyes I guess windows all of my sorrows.
when everything you thought was over, when trust settled back in, Boom! you blew it. big time. and until now I still can't accept it. my heart aches again and again every time I think of you doing it.
it's even sadder when that certain 'thing' you're doing doesn't even affect you anymore. what? bodohnya aku all this time I was fooled thinking you won't even touch it anymore. and why dalam banyak2 benda you nak buat, you idiotically have to take up this? WHY? where were all you're regrets before? where were your promises?
I dunno how I'm gonna cope this. and I dunno how this is going to end. Ya Allah, berikan aku ketabahan dan kekuatan untuk lalui semua ni. dan berilah dia hidayah untuk berhenti. he won't listen to me. pls pls pls stop what you are doing. don't make excuses just to cover up your act. pls I beg you. I love you.

dear God, all in three days?

I'm in Klang

Tarik nafas dalam-dalam.
Tahan nafas sekejap.
*beep*
Ok, nafas biasa.

And those are my lines for the next 3 weeks. Yup yup

updates?

I really don't know what I should post on, cause there's just too many things going through my mind now. okay, I'm lying. actually I'm lazy

salam Eid Mubarak

Happy Eid ul-Fitr everyone.
Forgive my wrongs and cherish the memories we created together.

and...

selamat hari raya Mama, Ayah, Hanif.

Raya just won't be the same without the whole family. my heart misses your presence here.

but loved ones,
don't shed many tears. miles won't separate my love for each and every one of you.
celebrate your early Raya with joy okay?
Kakak and me will always pray for you.

don't say goodbye

Dear Ramadan,

Your presence will always leave markings in my soul.

Your presence are far beyond a servant's dream.

Your presence has brought me closer to the Creator each time you come and go.

Thank you Ramadan.

Thank you Allah, my one and only god, for the blessing of Ramadan

hello hollies!

welcome! I missed you so much